Today is Day 2 of my post-(I hope)-bed bug life. The bug guys came Wednesday and wondrously declared us bed-bug-free--unless we see any disturbing (to put it mildly) signs. They inspected our beds, nooks, and crannies for about 45 minutes, gathered their carbon-dioxide/hormone-emitting traps, and left.
Am I relieved? excited? Hmmm. I'm not sure. I'm wary of celebrating too early. Maybe in a few months.
Am I grateful and ready to move on? Definitely. Can I move on? I must. By God's grace and as much as possible, I will steer my mind away from bed bugs and welcome relief and excitement.
The kids leaped for joy as I released them to take their clothes out of the large ziploc bags stowed in their drawers and in laundry baskets around their rooms. It was like Christmas morning. The clutter has strangely reappeared. It really does look like Christmas morning.
One hundred seven days of middle-class American terror. I am changed forever. On Days One and One Hundred Nine, I thought of Matthew 19:29-30:
A lot has happened with our friends Q and M. After Q got back from camp, his family was evicted from their home. Much has gone on in the five weeks since then. Today the boys' mother finally agreed to enter a drug rehabilitation program and sign over temporary guardianship to a family in our church. I know, because we're dealing with an addict, that all this progress could vanish by the time I sign out.
But one thing is certain: God is working. ("Aslan is on the move." I always got goose bumps when I came to that part in the tales of Narnia.) He is working in me, in my family, in Q and M, in Q's mother and family. His arms of redemption are far reaching and infinite. Our bed bugs were not random. They were lovingly, gently intentional. If I ever see another one, I will probably need to be reminded of that---right after I stop screaming.
This is why I have blogged about something as hideous and terrifying as bed bugs. I need to be reminded that God is in control, that He has always kept His promises, and that He always has good plans for me.
I can imagine reading this blog in years to come. I will probably be amused at my anxiety over such a small inconvenience (time will have softened the pain). I will certainly be embarrassed at my emotional vicissitudes and self absorption. I hope I will be in awe of God's grace. I know that I will look back with clearer vision of what He's done and greater faith in the character of God and in the person of Jesus Christ.
This is my last post. I trust there will be no sequel blog. Thanks for sharing my journey and for praying!
Karen
Am I relieved? excited? Hmmm. I'm not sure. I'm wary of celebrating too early. Maybe in a few months.
Am I grateful and ready to move on? Definitely. Can I move on? I must. By God's grace and as much as possible, I will steer my mind away from bed bugs and welcome relief and excitement.
The kids leaped for joy as I released them to take their clothes out of the large ziploc bags stowed in their drawers and in laundry baskets around their rooms. It was like Christmas morning. The clutter has strangely reappeared. It really does look like Christmas morning.
One hundred seven days of middle-class American terror. I am changed forever. On Days One and One Hundred Nine, I thought of Matthew 19:29-30:
And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands, for my name's sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.Have I really left my house or family or anything of great value for God's kingdom? No, I have not. But God has loosened my grip on possessions, and I have learned not to love my decorative pillows, curtains, and clothing like I used to. Do I still appreciate the comfort of my home? Oh, yes, I appreciate and am so grateful for it! But I so want those pleasures to be last and for God's kingdom to be first. This awareness and this desire are evidences of God's enabling and sanctifying grace in my life. How amazing that He can work in such mysterious ways in so many lives--all simultaneously and woven together perfectly!
A lot has happened with our friends Q and M. After Q got back from camp, his family was evicted from their home. Much has gone on in the five weeks since then. Today the boys' mother finally agreed to enter a drug rehabilitation program and sign over temporary guardianship to a family in our church. I know, because we're dealing with an addict, that all this progress could vanish by the time I sign out.
But one thing is certain: God is working. ("Aslan is on the move." I always got goose bumps when I came to that part in the tales of Narnia.) He is working in me, in my family, in Q and M, in Q's mother and family. His arms of redemption are far reaching and infinite. Our bed bugs were not random. They were lovingly, gently intentional. If I ever see another one, I will probably need to be reminded of that---right after I stop screaming.
This is why I have blogged about something as hideous and terrifying as bed bugs. I need to be reminded that God is in control, that He has always kept His promises, and that He always has good plans for me.
I can imagine reading this blog in years to come. I will probably be amused at my anxiety over such a small inconvenience (time will have softened the pain). I will certainly be embarrassed at my emotional vicissitudes and self absorption. I hope I will be in awe of God's grace. I know that I will look back with clearer vision of what He's done and greater faith in the character of God and in the person of Jesus Christ.
This is my last post. I trust there will be no sequel blog. Thanks for sharing my journey and for praying!
Karen
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