Today is Day 2 of my post-(I hope)-bed bug life.  The bug guys came Wednesday and wondrously declared us bed-bug-free--unless we see any disturbing (to put it mildly) signs. They inspected our beds, nooks, and crannies for about 45 minutes, gathered their carbon-dioxide/hormone-emitting traps, and left.
Am I relieved? excited?  Hmmm.  I'm not sure.  I'm wary of celebrating too early.  Maybe in a few months.
Am I grateful and ready to move on?  Definitely.  Can I move on?  I must.  By God's grace and as much as possible, I will steer my mind away from bed bugs and welcome relief and excitement.
The kids leaped for joy as I released them to take their clothes out of the large ziploc bags stowed in their drawers and in laundry baskets around their rooms.  It was like Christmas morning.  The clutter has strangely reappeared.  It really does look like Christmas morning.
One hundred seven days of middle-class American terror.  I am changed forever.  On Days One and One Hundred Nine, I thought of Matthew 19:29-30:

And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands, for my name's sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life.  But many who are first will be last, and the last first.

Have I really left my house or family or anything of great value for God's kingdom?  No, I have not.  But God has loosened my grip on possessions, and I have learned not to love my decorative pillows, curtains, and clothing like I used to.  Do I still appreciate the comfort of my home?  Oh, yes, I appreciate and am so grateful for it!  But I so want those pleasures to be last and for God's kingdom to be first. This awareness and this desire are evidences of God's enabling and sanctifying grace in my life.  How amazing that He can work in such mysterious ways in so many lives--all simultaneously and woven together perfectly!

A lot has happened with our friends Q and M. After Q got back from camp, his family was evicted from their home.  Much has gone on in the five weeks since then. Today the boys' mother finally agreed to enter a drug rehabilitation program and sign over temporary guardianship to a family in our church.  I know, because we're dealing with an addict, that all this progress could vanish by the time I sign out.
But one thing is certain:  God is working. ("Aslan is on the move."  I always got goose bumps when I came to that part in the tales of Narnia.)  He is working in me, in my family, in Q and M, in Q's mother and family. His arms of redemption are far reaching and infinite. Our bed bugs were not random.  They were lovingly, gently intentional.  If I ever see another one, I will probably need to be reminded of that---right after I stop screaming.
This is why I have blogged about something as hideous and terrifying as bed bugs.  I need to be reminded that God is in control, that He has always kept His promises, and that He always has good plans for me.
I can imagine reading this blog in years to come.  I will probably be amused at my anxiety over such a small inconvenience (time will have softened the pain).  I will certainly be embarrassed at my emotional vicissitudes and self absorption.  I hope I will be in awe of God's grace.  I know that I will look back with clearer vision of what He's done and greater faith in the character of God and in the person of Jesus Christ.
This is my last post.  I trust there will be no sequel blog.  Thanks for sharing my journey and for praying!
Karen

It just occurred to me that throughout the entire two weeks of Olympics, I never suspected any athlete of bed bug bedlam--even after hearing references to the Olympic Village.  This is a miracle!  

I've thoroughly enjoyed the distraction of the Olympics the past two weeks.  Add to that our continued absence of bed bugs. I am one deep-sleeping, relaxed, and grateful woman!  The bug guys come this week.  I'll keep you posted. . . 

An Encouraging Sunday Morning

Before the world was made,

Before You spoke it to be,

You were the King of kings.

Yes, You were, yes, You were.

 

And now You're reigning still

Enthroned above all things.

Angels and saints cry out.

We join them as we sing,

 

Glory to God, glory to God,

Glory to God, forever!

Glory to God, glory to God,

Glory to God, forever!

 

Creator God, You gave

Me breath so I could praise

Your great and matchless name

All my days, all my days!

 

So let my whole life be

A blazing offering,

A life that shouts and sings

The greatness of our King!

 

Glory to God, glory to God,

Glory to God, forever!

Glory to God, glory to God,

Glory to God, forever!

 

Take my life and let it be

All for You and for Your glory!

Take my life and let it be Yours!

Home Again

One week ago today, I had climbed mountains, forded streams, followed rainbows--can you hear the surging orchestra?--and was about to "search high and low" yet again at a hotel on our way home from New Hampshire.  I feel a huge sense of relief and accomplishment at having slept at three hotels, as well as another home, over the course of two weeks.  Not a wink of sleep was lost, praise the Lord! Naturally, I spent a good deal of time scouring mattresses, headboards, nightstands, and carpets on this vacation. This was all great joke fodder, and everyone delighted in watching me search wide-eyed and serious through the room before allowing anyone to breathe or set his overnight plastic ziploc bag down--in the bathtub. After two weeks of vacation though, I had almost become comfortable putting books and bags on the floor, letting my hand touch the nightstand next to my side of the bed while I slept, washing clothes every three days in cold water--in general, not having to think or do as I have the past ten weeks.  It was a vacation from my problems (#whataboutbob?).  Yet for the first time that I remember, I didn't want to come home again.  The eighteen-hour trip back to South Carolina was riddled with dread.  I wanted to stay comfortable, unchallenged, mindless.  Friday as we traveled and Sunday in church God began revealing (again) my idols of ease, comfort, and control.

And a ruler asked [Jesus], “Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?”  And Jesus said to him, “Why do you call me good? No one is good except God alone. You know the commandments: ‘Do not commit adultery, Do not murder, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Honor your father and mother.’”  And he said, “All these I have kept from my youth.”  When Jesus heard this, he said to him, “One thing you still lack. Sell all that you have and distribute to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.”  But when he heard these things, he became very sad, for he was extremely rich.  Jesus, seeing that he had become sad, said, “How difficult it is for those who have wealth to enter the kingdom of God!  For it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the kingdom of God.”  Those who heard it said, “Then who can be saved?”  But he said, “What is impossible with man is possible with God.”   Luke 18:18-27  

I am like the rich young ruler who has just been busted by the God who sees the depths of my heart and calls out my idols.  The ruler clung to his wealth; I clutch ease, comfort, control. The "hindrances" to my joy--bugs, labor, worry, people--are really God's spotlight on my soul, His kind and gentle uncovering of "my precious." The ruler went away sad.  I know how he felt.  How difficult it is for those who have wealth to enter the kingdom of God!  How difficult it is for those who trust in chariots, horses, strength, cleanliness, an unaltered schedule, peace and quiet, predictability, health, intelligence, well-behaved children, a good reputation . . . to enter the kingdom of God!  

I am nonplussed.  I don't understand my weakness and inability to lay my idols down once and for all.  

"Then who can be saved?"  "What is impossible with man is possible with God."  This is why Jesus came.

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful.  Hebrews 10:23

I run to the author and finisher of my faith.  I trust that this little, momentary affliction--if I can even call it that--is God's plan to perfect my faith.  I trust in His faithfulness, His character, His plan.  
We have seen no bugs or evidence of bugs since our return.  Yesterday the bug guys came, saw, and sprayed.   Good news!  We move on to the final stages of treatment:  one more round of pesticide in three weeks and then a final check three weeks after that.  So long as no more bugs show up.

  

Getting ready to go on vacation involves using suitcases and staying at a hotel.  Help!  The exterminators gave me a low-toxic spray to use on our suitcases (to repel bugs although I don't think we have any there) and in the hotel room (definitely using it there).  Another precaution we're taking is packing our overnight clothes in large ziploc bags to avoid any possibility of bugs from the hotel.  I've discovered, thanks to my aunt, some fantastic, heavy-duty, inexpensive ziploc bags at Dollar Tree, and over the last ten weeks, I have made several trips there, procuring bags by the dozen. I've used these to pack all our clothes and items on bookshelves.  On one occasion, the cashier at Dollar Tree asked me if I were the woman who was buying up all their bags.  Wow.  I didn't see that coming.  Paranoid, I suspected that she suspected me of bed-bug infestation.  I offered some sort of "spring cleaning" explanation (which is true) and started buying my bags at various other Dollar Trees in town.  
So all I have to do now is chill.  The kids are great at this. Speaking statistical logic to myself helps somewhat:  "You haven't seen a bed bug in over a month.  You haven't seen spots on the bed sheets in three weeks.  The bug guys have promoted you."  Speaking truth about God to myself helps infinitely more because these truths are certain and don't change:  "He will never leave me or forsake me.  He delights in me. He never slumbers or sleeps.  He cares for me."  I'm learning slowly and sporadically.  

Celebrating and rejoicing today in my blessings!  I'm a happy wife, a joyful mom, a contented homemaker of an apparently (I'm hoping) bed-bug-free home, a citizen of the best country in the world, and an awestruck child of the God of the universe!